(Belated) Bring Your Action Figure to Work Day

Friday, according to the internets, was Bring Your Action Figure to Work Day. I missed it in 2017, so I wanted to be sure to remember it in 2018, and stuck it on my calendar. Coincidentally, I also had a vacation day stuck on my calendar for Friday, so I missed the entire day, and decided to make up for it yesterday. As I did in 2016, I brought Northstar, and he seemed to find the whole thing as distasteful as he did last time he was here.



This is what you do? You talk on a phone all day?

Well, not all day. I mean, I talk on the phone a lot, but...

This is an actual job, that people are paid for? Why didn't you become a gay world champion downhill skier, like me? Or Gus Kenworthy? That's much more exciting.

I don't know. I'm not good at skiing.

Also, your office is messy.



You don't have a cup for these pens? You just fling them anywhere?

Well, I mean...



Why do you still have eclipse glasses on your desk? Are you saving them for the next eclipse? Are you, Joel?

Maybe?

It's half a decade away, Joel. You're going to go half a decade without cleaning your desk off?

Cleaning my desk off doesn't mean throwing everything on it away.

Is that a Hydra pin?

What?



Are you in Hydra, Joel? If I lean in, are you going to whisper, "Hail Hydra" to me?

No! Somebody gave that to me.

Sure. OK. That's why you still have it.



Why do those toys live in your office? They're not good enough for your apartment?

No. I like those toys. I just think they look good on the bookshelf.

Is that the lie your Hydra masters told you to tell?

No?

And this...



Why do you have a whole drawer full of stress balls, Joel?

Mostly for conversations like this.



And why are we even still here, having this conversation? It's after five.

I don't know, Northstar.

I don't know.